Here’s a short guide to reacting peacefully:

1. When you notice yourself getting offended, frustrated, angry, irritated, disappointed … pause. Take a breath.
2. Don’t act. Acting in anger is harmful.
3. Examine the idea you have about how they should act. You are holding onto this idea, and it is in conflict with reality. As long as you hold onto fantasies that aren’t in line with reality, you will be frustrated. Try changing all of reality to match your expectations — let me know when you finally succeed.
4. Toss your expectation into the ocean.
5. Smile. Accept the person in front of you, and yourself, as a flawed human.
6. Act with compassion. When you stop blaming the person for not acting perfectly, you can then respond appropriately, and with compassion. Accepting reality doesn’t mean you don’t take action — it just means you let go of the frustration. Instead, you can act appropriately, and be more centered in your actions.

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